i don't like sucking hair
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Randomize
