do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
