K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
