Non-Jews are for practice
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Randomize
