You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
