In America we eat man semen.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize