i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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