I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
