I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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