I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
