Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
