wanna go halves on a baby?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
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