he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
