hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize