woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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