at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
He kissed a someone with a penis
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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