Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
