what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
