i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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