Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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