I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
