dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
And then my night got REAL pukey
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
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