Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
