wakey wakey hands off snakey
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
