but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
