if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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