if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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