You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
