He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize