im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
