Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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