All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
