Tell her she can't have a vagina
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
