Got a toothbrush?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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