he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
