i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Alive.
So much puke
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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