i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
