well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
