you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
