It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Randomize
