bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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