All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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