Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
