Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
