i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
