shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
