If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
