He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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