He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
When did we convert life to cartoon?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
