scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
